Return to the Image of G-d – Male & Female Relationship
The month of Elul is all about Teshuvah (repentance). It literally means
return to our original purpose of creation. The Torah introduces the purpose of
humanity at the very beginning of Genesis, where it describes how Hashem
created the first human being(s) in His image: “G-d created the human being in
His image, in the image of G-d He created him, male and female He created them”
(Bereishit 1:27). The very next Torah verse directs us to be fruitful
and multiply (Ibid. 28). Doing Teshuvah during the month of Elul means
returning to become a true image of G-d. But what does it mean to be an image
of G-d? The Shelah Hakodesh explains that Adam was created in the image of G-d, and only
Israel is called Adam (Yechezkiel 34:31, Baba Metzia 114b).
Therefore, ten fingers were imprinted within him, corresponding to the ten Sefirot…
(Shelah Hakodesh, Parashat V’zot Haberacha, Ohr 3). Just as Hashem is
manifested through his Sefirot, so is Israel – the true Adam – created in G-d’s
image, a reflection of these Sefirot. The Sefirot on the right branch of the
Tree of Life are male, whereas the Sefirot on the left branch are female. The
Image of G-d, therefore, includes both male and female attributes, and its
highest expression is reflected in the proper relationship between male and
female. A further support for this principle is the very first Divine word to
the newly created man and woman, “be fruitful and multiply.” In the second
creation account, the Torah describes the creation of the first woman. Immediately
after her creation, we are told, “Therefore, a man must leave his father and
mother and cleave to his wife and they shall become one flesh” (Bereishit
2:24).
The Highest Expression of Free
Choice: Overcoming the Desire for Homosexuality
Today, unfortunately, various human rights movements adhere to the
belief that the highest expression of humanism is the right to exercise freedom
of choice in every aspect of life, including the right to establish same sex
marriages. I believe a law was recently passed in Israel to legalize such
marriages. The importance of Free Choice cannot be emphasized enough in
Judaism. Yet, there are very different approaches to defining what Free Choice
entails. In the secular world, Free Choice is defined as the lack of
restrictions. Allowing our impulses and desires to act, however, we feel like
without restrictions, as long as we don’t hurt anyone else, is the secular definition
of the highest expression of Free Choice. However, the delineation of “when it’s
not hurting anyone else” is not clear-cut and may be open to interpretation. Is
publicly exposing homosexual relationships not a harmful example for others, especially
children? In the Torah, we are not only prohibited from hurting others, but we
are furthermore forbidden to hurt ourselves. Therefore, suicide is considered a
primary transgression in the Torah. I would venture to say that violating our
Divine image by homosexual relationships can be compared to spiritual suicide.
If we make a personal choice to purposely go against reflecting our Image of
G-d in a fruitful male/female relationship, then what kind of spiritual meaning
does our life serve? The Torah’s definition of Free Choice is diametrically
opposed to that of the secular world. Rather than giving in to our desires and
impulses, the Torah calls us to elevate ourselves to reflect our Divine Image
by overcoming fruitless desires. Judaism credits the power of our Free Choice with
the ability to make the right choices even when it goes against our natural
inborn instincts. Thus, the definitions of Free Choice from the secular and
Torah perspectives clash through their respective views on homosexuality.
According to the secular view, homosexuality is an expression of exercising one’s
Free Choice by following one’s own desires without giving in to religious and or
social pressure. According to the Torah, Free Choice empowers every person with
the ability to overcome even a natural, hormonal, inborn tendency and physical
desire towards homosexuality by abstaining from committing such an act for the
sake of spiritual growth and perfection.
Remaking Ourselves in Tune with the
Purpose of Creation
The ‘sense’ associated with the Month of Elul is עֲשִֹיָּה/asiyah – ‘action’
or ‘making.’ The Torah teaches us, וּשְׁמַרְתֶּם מִצְוֹתַי וַעֲשִׂיתֶם אֹתָם – “Keep the mitzvot and
do them” (Vayikra 22:31). B’nei Yissaschar asks, why do we need
to be told to both keep and do the mitzvot? He further wonders why it doesn’t
simply state, “Keep and do the mitzvot,” but rather, “Keep the mitzvot and do them.” He
explains that the answer lies in the Hebrew word for ‘do them’ which can also
mean ‘make them’ or – with a slight change of vowels – ‘make themselves.’ The Midrash teaches that when we keep the
mitzvot, it is considered as if we made ourselves (Midrash Vayikra Rabbah
35:7). Similarly, when we do Teshuvah, Hashem considers it as if we became a
new creation (Midrash Vayikra Rabbah 30:3). Since the Month of Elul is
the month of Teshuvah, and becoming a ba’al teshuvah (master of return)
is considered as a new creation, as if we had remade ourselves. Therefore, the
‘sense’ of action/making is especially fitting for this month (B’nei
Yissaschar Article for the Month of Elul 1:6) So the power of Teshuvah to
change ourselves knows no bounds. As part of the ultimate Free Choice, we have
the ability to make ourselves anew, to become a completely altered and new
person in tune with our purpose of creation. In light of this principle, we can
now understand that the only appropriate answer to the question, ‘What is
Judaism’s view of the Jewish homosexual?’ is, ‘There is no such individual’ (Homosexuality
and Judaism, Rabbi Barry Freundel, quoting M.H. Spero, ‘Homosexuality:
Clinical and Ethical Challenges,’ in Judaism and Psychology: Halachic
Perspectives, Yeshiva University, 1980). Within
Talmudic and Halachic responsa, there is no term to define a homosexual Jew.
The modern transliteration of homosexual into Hebrew only proves the point that
no term exists. The homosexual is never listed among the recognized categories
of Jewish society – Kohen, Levi, woman, slave, king, deaf, mute, and so on. The
only category that includes the Jewish homosexual is מומר לתיאבון/mumar l’teiavon (one
whose desires put him in opposition to Torah law). Thus, according to the Torah,
‘homosexual’ is a term that is limited to the description of an activity, as
opposed to a term that describes a minority group. Therefore, we must not ostracize
a person who practices homosexuality any more than we would shun any other Jew who
breaks Shabbat or eats non-kosher. “Don’t judge your friend until you arrive at
his place” (Pirkey Avot 2:4). We do not have any inkling of the
difficult tests this person is up against, and which genetic, social, and
traumatic experiences caused his or her sexual orientation. Therefore, we must
show compassion and encourage such an individual to harness the power of Free
Choice to redirect his or her desires, thereby remaking themselves anew.
Virgo and the Question of Female
Homosexuality
The astrological sign of the month of Elul, Virgo, is connected
with the purity of repentance – remaking ourselves into a new creation. The
Jewish congregation is likened to a virgin, untouched and pure. We are
continually endeared to Hashem as if for the very first time. The sexual purity
with which the constellation of Virgo is associated alludes to the importance
of focusing on sexual purity during our Teshuvah throughout the month of Elul.
It has been brought to my attention that many Jewish women, even those who
belong to the Torah camp, practice homosexuality occasionally. Female
homosexuality is often thought not to be explicitly forbidden by the Torah. Perhaps
this mistaken conclusion arises because there is no specific prohibition for
female homosexuality the way the Torah explicitly forbids male homosexuality, “You shall not lie with a man, the way of lying with a
woman; it is an abomination” (Vayikra 18:22). In addition, female homosexuality does not
entail emission and wasting of seed which has the ability to create new life.
Thirdly, it does not entail any actual consummation of the sexual act of
becoming “one flesh” as does male homosexuality. Nevertheless, Rambam rules
unequivocally that lesbianism is forbidden by the Torah (D’oraita): “Lesbian relations are forbidden. This is מִדַּרְכֵי מִצְרַיִם/midarchei Mitzrayim –‘the conduct of Egypt’ which we were warned against, as
[Vayikra 18:3] states: “Do not follow the conduct of Egypt.” Our Sages
said, What would they do? A man would marry a man, a woman would marry a woman,
and a woman would marry two men. Although this conduct is forbidden, [by Scriptural Law, the verse is not merely cited as support for a
Rabbinic injunction], lashes are not
given for it, for it is not a specific prohibition, since it doesn’t involve intercourse.
Therefore, such women are not forbidden to marry a Kohen as zonot
(prostitutes), nor does a woman become prohibited to her husband because of
this, for this is not considered harlotry. It is, however, appropriate to give
them lashes for rebellious conduct because they performed a transgression. A
man should take precautions with his wife concerning this matter and should
prevent women who are known to engage in such practices from visiting her and
her from visiting them” (Rambam, Mishnah Torah, the Laws of Forbidden
Sexuality, Chapter 21, Halacha 8). The Shulchan
Aruch (Even HaEzer 20:2) reiterates Rambam’s ruling almost word for
word.
Returning to the Purpose of Our Creation
To conclude, we are placed
in this world to exercise our Free Choice – to live as spiritual beings
fulfilling the will of our Creator, rather than distorting the Torah to justify an inability to control
physical desires. Hashem never gives a mitzvah that is beyond the ability of an individual to fulfill. Whatever one’s sexual orientation, no one is trapped in a living prison without exit or key. Contrary to the
bombardment of the media promulgating gays’ rights, a recent study reported a success rate of more
than 70% for redirecting homosexual orientation (Schwartz, M.F. and Masters,
W.H., “Masters and Johnson Treatment Program for Dissatisfied Homosexual Men.”
American Journal of Psychiatry 141:2, February 1984, pp. 173-181. The study
reported a success rate of 79% after one year and 71% after five years. This
demonstrates that when we truly desire to live by the Torah, nothing is
impossible. May we seize the opportunity of Elul to choose eternal life – to do
Teshuvah, correct our ways, renew ourselves, and return to the purpose of our
creation!
